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My Story
JL 46 - April 2008
Finally I am sitting down to write this letter. From the
moment I left your office in February I have thought about this letter daily and
have spent a great deal of time soul searching, beating myself up and finally
here to the point of pen to paper ( so to speak).
I believe I must have this surgery to give me my life
back. when I was younger being overweight, actually being obese, did not limit
me as it does now. At that time I thought to myself "I can still walk long
distances, clean my home, play with my kids" and being obese had no effect on
that. It is no longer the case and I am mourning the loss and angry at the
denial I lived in for so long. Now my knees are so bad I can barely walk without
pain, hiking or climbing is a sure "advil" experience and my housekeeping feels
so overwhelming as I struggle to take the vacuum up and down stairs or carry
full laundry baskets as I must hold on to the railing for support. My left knee
is so bad that I cannot bend over to tie up my shoe and this is like an arrow to
my soul every time I have to ask my husband for his help. How I got here is a
life long journey and my counsellor has assisted in helping me to forgive those
I blamed and recognize the patterns I have been in. But it does not change where
I am today, back in your office. I am a strong ,bright, responsible woman yet
this obesity brings me to my knees and I need your help. I know the work I need
to do and although it may sound silly I look forward to the work. I look forward
to small portions, watching what I eat and the consequences if I do not watch
myself. I visit the website daily and I look forward to being one of those
people with the before and after pictures. I know with all my heart that this is
the right answer for me. I also know the surgery is a tool for weight loss and I
am the master of that tool.
JL |
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